Behavioral Management
Behavioral management. How tiresome this word has become among hip Christian circles. I admit, usually I grow weary of the blithe, trite and frumpy lexicon we pull from. However, on this occasion quite an opposite annoyance is forced upon us. People love to hate it. Walk into any bible study at Mars Hill, simply intone your distaste for Behavioral Management and they will love you. What, you ask, is behavioral management?
To the naysayer’s the term describes a simple change of action with no true repentance of the underlying heart issue. In this view, unless the heart changes first, the behavior change is utterly useless. In fact, worse than useless because it may lead to pride.
This, of course is true, but it confuses the end goal for the process. True heart transformation must absolutely be the goal of every change in our life, but this does not exonerate us from the slow and dogged task of modifying the behavior in question.
Most often I hear the phrase after a person has made at least an initial attempt at change. Burned out and fried from battling an addiction, the promise of a quick, easy heart change is lucrative. Almost without fail, at this point, someone dangles the idea of effortless change. And they’re always the one with the miraculous story of their instant freedom from the bondage of sin. The alcoholic who awoke from prayer without the faintest desire for a drink ever again. Great. Yes, these stories are inspirational and I truly believe they show the power of the Holy Spirit. But they are inspirational because they are exceptional. I.e. they don’t happen often.
Imagine for a moment what the world would look like if God primarily worked this way. Gosh, I’ve struggled with greed lately, I’ll just toss up a quick prayer and Poof! Never again will the lure of money distract me from ministry. Don’t get me wrong, I’d take it in an instant. But God rarely redeems us with such miraculous expediency.
I recently listened to a brilliant sermon by John Piper on the nature of God speaking to us. He contends that Jesus rarely reveals His will to us through the miraculous ‘hearing’ of Him. Though counter intuitive, this is of great benefit because it forces us to redeem the motives, desires and underlying foundation of our will that truly affects God’s will in our life. I believe a similar correlation exists with our desire for change.
Certainly it is within our Fathers power to instantly regenerate our entire heart and actions. But at what cost? What would we lose by foregoing the grinding process of willful change? Like the God of prosperity doctrine, it would turn our Lord into a celestial slot machine. God wants more. He desires to redeem each and every aspect of your life that feeds the sin you so long to slay. The myriad desires and idols without which addictions cannot stand.
I know this sounds painful and exhausting, but what a beautiful relationship awaits those who persevere. The God who graces you with the slow change of will and behavior is no less loving and miraculous than He who redeems in an instant. When I look back at the biggest changes in my life, none of them come with a dramatic story of immediate transformation. And for this I am thankful, knowing His grace is sufficient.
Posted: July 28th, 2008 under .
Comments
Comment from Nate
Time July 29, 2008 at 8:10 am
James, your idea of “heart change” is somewhat confusing. Why do you think it is something that happens instantaneously and all that is required is to simply ask for a change?
I agree, that if this is the definition, we would be hard pressed in finding many people to testify to this kind of power.
What I would deem as heart change is rather a conscious recognition of our hearts true motives, and seek to change those at the points of stray. Understanding your hearts ill motivations and then seeking to change those by dwelling on what is right, seems to be a better definition of heart change. At least, to me.
Comment from Anonymous
Time July 29, 2008 at 1:06 pm
Yes, Nate you’re absolutely correct, the true definition of heart change would be much closer to yours. But I think often we live under a different definition. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the advice of ’stop trying to change, just let God change your heart.’ And with it comes the implication that nothing else is required. No hard resistance of temptation, no valleys, no real effort. Focusing on the heart motives is certainly where we ought to start, but I think we often fail to change because we think this new route doesn’t require hard work.
Comment from Nate
Time July 29, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Well, as long as i am more correct than James, that is all that matters.
Comment from Paul
Time July 29, 2008 at 11:05 pm
“What would we lose by foregoing the grinding process of willful change?” That reminds me of something I’ve experienced in the past. When people are struggling through something and are willing to share their struggle with others, good things start happening. The “masks” that each of us have start breaking down. Deeper relationships start to form. And people get a stronger desire to love each other and help each other. At least that’s what I’ve experienced. If God instantly “fixed” things, and people didn’t struggle, I doubt that would really happen. And that would be a shame.
Comment from David Mallory
Time August 30, 2008 at 2:24 pm
I have found that the two work upon one another. Even though Paul and James seem to disagree they both recognize that you cannot have true faith without works. Paul has to consistently remind his followers that grace does not mean exemption from doing good, but should lead to doing good. I think at a certain point you have to look at your posting by Cherston. If you try and figure out exactly how the two (actions and heart) work together you will fail and go mad and we need to be careful about oversimplifying the equation. One works off the other like a wave moves through the water. A change in heart should follow with a change in action, but a change in action can lead to a change in heart. Praying after all is an action- a change in behavior, if you have never prayed before. Like your essay on obedience shows, we do not always feel like doing what God calls us to, which shows sometime we need to change our behavior when our heart is neutral and our body and mind are resisting all attempts at change. Through this obedience our hearts have the opportunity to change further. If our behavior, our actions, did not affect our heart then why would God care about our actions? I see this in very simple ways in my own life. In my heart I may be truly angry, jealous, or hateful towards someone, if I act on this it encourages this part of me. If I merely conceal it, it grows as well, but if I change my behavior in obedience to a loving God, my heart will soften as well.
Comment from Elizabeth K
Time September 17, 2008 at 7:44 pm
This issue of behavior vs. heart really confuses me sometimes… especially when I need to make some kind of a decision in some kind of a frustrating circumstance.
I might know the right thing, but my heart wants to do something different…. Many a person would tell me just to do the right thing anyway… but this always seems to backfire.
If I wait (in faith), before acting, I will eventually have some kind of a heart change…. Even though heart and behavior perfectly intertwine, some level of heart always must initiate some level of right action…. This relates to the principle of God’s grace enabling our obedience, rather than fueling our pride.
The thing that happens either in an instant or develops over time is our faith…. Maybe a more child-like faith results in a quicker behavior change… and a strong, enduring faith is what takes more time?
This blog is sparking all kinds of thoughts for me right now.
Comment from Chris
Time July 29, 2008 at 4:13 am
Nice post, man!
“I grow weary of the blithe, trite and frumpy lexicon we pull from…”
Ha. I love this line. Interestingly enough, I’m not familiar with the phrase, “behavioral management,” but I learned enough quickly through this post.